Anecdotes and memories of the author's childhood portray a child attempting to cope with the erratic, self-centered, abusive behaviors of his parents. The profiled child became mistrustful of others, socially isolated, deprived of emotional intimacy, and critical of self as the reason for the abusive parental treatment. The author describes how these childhood deficits transferred to adulthood as he became addicted to alcohol, drugs, tobacco, and sugar. His social handicaps were manifested in an inability to express and experience intimacy. After a failed marriage, he assumed joint custody of his daughter. Desiring to change himself, he joined some self-help groups, entered therapy and began to keep a diary. Overall, he gained insight into how his behaviors and attitudes had been formed by his childhood experiences and began to use resources to reform his behavior and attitudes based in a commitment to love himself and to give the kind of parenting he wished he had received.