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Remember the Children

NCJ Number
156145
Journal
Ms. Volume: 5 Issue: 2 Dated: (September/October 1994) Pages: 38-41
Author(s)
R L Bray
Date Published
1994
Length
4 pages
Annotation
This article describes the author's reactions as a child and subsequent behaviors and feelings as an adult in the context of emotionally and physically abusive behavior by her father against her mother.
Abstract
The author's father kept the family in a state of terror with uncontrolled rages. Her mother and all the children were terrorized into compliance with his wishes. For the children, this included whippings with a belt, and for her mother it meant being punched and kicked. In adult life, behavioral reactions to various stimuli reflect her experiences with her father as a child. If any man raises his voice anywhere, for any reason, she becomes anxious and fearful. In her interaction with her husband, it is difficult for her to allow him to be angry, since it causes such anxiety within her. Waves of fear turn into anger, and she "blows up" at her husband. She also carries the fear that she will become like her mother, passive and fearful in interaction with her husband, or like her father, becoming enraged if her children do not comply with her wishes. Based on her personal experience, the author argues that attention must be paid to the psychological impact of domestic rage and violence upon the children who live in the home where it occurs.