The data were gathered through conversations with 13 women who had been involved with physically or mentally abusive men, and with four men who were committing the abuse. The research showed that domestic violence affects not only marginalized members of society, but ordinary people, and may be seen as part of ordinary life. This climate of acceptance means that victims often fail to report their abuse and to seek assistance from statutory agencies. The article focuses on the characteristics of male abusers, the statutory response to domestic violence, and men's accounts of the violence they perpetrate against women and against other men. 3 notes and 5 references