The authors suggest child neglect is best understood as an absence of care, that is, a breakdown in the relationship between primary caregivers and children which results in difficulties in providing reliable and adequate care. Therefore, one focus of assessments in child neglect cases needs to be on ascertaining the nature and degree of relationship failure. A framework to inform such assessments is presented that considers the relationship between primary caregivers and children. The authors note discussion of child neglect often involves criticism of women-mothers, and they seek to develop an approach to child neglect that challenges stereotypical ideas about gender and caring, ideas that can lead to inappropriate intervention and mother-blaming. An effort is made to operationalize the framework, and intentional, structured observation is identified as a useful tool in accurately assessing the complexities of the mother-child relationship. Finally, the authors discuss the contribution of observation to the assessment of child neglect at several different levels. 31 references