A multiple-choice, open-ended questionnaire was administered to 505 students in 56 upper level classes at Indiana University. The survey instrument covered demographic information, witnessing and experiencing violence in childhood, attitudes on violence and instrumentality-expressiveness, and dating information. The results strongly suggest that seriousness of the relationshp and the personality dimensions of instrumentality and expressiveness explain dating violence for men, while a situation of jealousy explains dating violence for women. Additionally, though men and women do not significantly differ in the rate at which they use violence, women are more likely than men to receive violence. These findings are understood in terms of the aspect of control which we argue underlies violent relationships. Tabular data and 25 references. (Author abstract modified).