A sample of 283 gays and lesbians reported on their experiences both as victims and perpetrators of gay/lesbian relationship violence by completing a modified version of the Conflict Tactics Scale (Straus, Gelles, and Steinmetz, 1980). General results show that 47.5 percent of lesbians and 29.7 percent of gays had been victimized by a same-sex partner. Lesbians reported an overall perpetration rate of 38 percent compared to 21.8 percent for gay men. Also, lesbians were more likely to be classified as victims and perpetrators of violence than gay men, and lesbians were more likely to report pushing or being pushed than gay men. Further, lesbians reported experiencing a greater number of different victimization and perpetration tactics than gay men. Finally, when items were weighted to create an indicator of severity, no significant differences between lesbians and gay men were found. The implications of these findings include a need to move beyond theories of domestic abuse that use gendered definitions of victim and perpetrator. 2 tables and 41 references